Jayne Whyte's Portfolio

It is so sad that domestic violence still happens in so many homes. Luckily for me,  I never experienced it in my family while growing up and now as an adult but, I have witnessed it….so many times….as a child. Living with my family in Lagos state, we had this neighbour, a family who would disturb the whole neighbourhood with the family palava, the parents would fight and the children will join hands with their mum and beat their father to a pulp and if NEPA decides to strike while the fight is on…GHEN GHEN…….we start hearing the noise of someone going through the cutleries, searching for a knife or a ladle aka ‘turning garri’ hoping to use it on their opponent. It was terrible that my siblings and I grew up witnessing such an event…..I can never forget!. And guess what, they had kids named Faith and Hope……..none named Charity…….maybe if they did, Charity would have created that atmosphere for love in that family……LOL. JUST THINKING!.

I lived in Port Harcourt for about four years and those years were some of my worst years in my entire years partly because I had to witness domestic violence first-hand. I had a muscular neighbour, who was also a deacon at his church, he would beat his wife at the slightest provocation, even when he wasn’t provoked he just enjoyed beating his wife. They were blessed with three girls and we (other neighbours) thought that maybe he wasn’t happy because he didn’t have a son, and then, God blessed him with one and GUESS WHAT…one night after an argument, just barely a month after the son was born, he locked the both of them out in the cold. The woman pleaded, neighbours begged him….he remained adamant. They slept outside in the cold.

Whenever the pastor intervened, he would take sides with the man because he gives “cheerfully” to his church, pastors wife will simply tell “madam submit. marriage is patience……you are a woman, you cannot have your way…..according to the book of…………” NONSENSE!. He would tell the children all sorts of bad things about their mother, he turned her into his punching bag, used brooms, belts, chains on her body……even when she pretended that she had fainted, the man kept on hitting her.

So many times I cried for her and wished she had someone she could turn to for help.In Nigeria, Its a tough situation for victims of domestic violence, its either you die silently or die trying to save yourself. to tell a woman or a young girl that she has no right is one of the worst things you can ever do. Women have same right as men whether you take it or leave it and because of the shame and stigma, no one wants to talk about it.

Watching this video has brought back memories…..which I really wish I could forget….but also wishing we had laws to protect women and young girls against domestic violence. It is definitely not a good thing to be beaten and to beat.

Lets love!.